| She Draws Stars With Her Eyes |
[Nov. 13th, 2009|03:00 pm] |
And sometimes the inspiration comes from one of the most extraordinary of smiles on the most ordinary of nights..
"She Draws Stars With Her Eyes"
She draws stars with her eyes
As she tames my feral heart
Causing black coals of inspiration
To burn white-hot and ignite
While I stumble
Ever encumbered
By the very thought
The very thought of you and I
So are we something?
Oh, are we something?
Something more than just a night
You see, sweetheart
I long to write sonnets
Of love and of want
With lingering kisses
Across your exposed waist
And your naked thighs
My lips of crimson ink pressed
With a purpose and a passion
Against your parchment paper skin
Devoted solely to your pleasure
Determined to hear those
Desperate yet wistful sighs
Precious are these moments
Where you spread wide open
Allowing me to record you fully
With my eyes
With my mind
Your every crease
Your every curve
You are every line
Of love and of want
That I shall ever write!
You are all that sparkles
When it is my eyes
That finally close
As you are all that exists
In my mind each and every night
You are the pretty words
You are the poetry
You are all that shall inspire me
For now and for always
The perfect smile
On the perfect night
© Brian Milici
November 13, 2009
My mother recently broke her foot. She's been in a boot to help it heal. We will go to the doctor in four weeks to see if she can remove the boot and walk on it.
I have been sick the past couple of weeks, and cancelled gaming the past two Friday nights. However, we're going to be role-playing tonight, so hopefully that will be fun. I've got to do some prep work for tonight, actually.
Bryan actually left me a voicemail on Wednesday but I didn't find out about it until late last night. I don't know what to do about it, really. I suppose I could text him. I haven't had much time to myself lately.
Feedback on the poetry is very much appreciated!
Hope all is well with you guys.
May you always find your smile. |
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| The art of her |
[Nov. 5th, 2009|01:53 am] |
You know it is her eyes, I have decided.
The way she looks past the surface of the sun. Beyond the bright lights and searing heat, there is a warmth she finds not only in the arms of comfort. Oh, but in the arms of love.
Really, there are few in this life that see through perfect lenses. Surveying the landscape of life for substance not circumstance, and searching for more than just a night of revelry.
It is that very desire for something more that burns ever so dangerously in her eyes.
And I have always found danger so exciting.
Especially when it is rooted in a sturdy heart.
Contradiction that, you might suggest.
How does the stable love be uncertain enough to keep you forever guessing and never expecting? How is it that the normalcy of knowing what to expect also then present the possibility for so much more you cannot really grasp?
How can she be so very certain in herself and identity, and yet provide enough mystery to have you wrap your arms around her ever tighter each and every night in the subtle hopes you might someday find her heart unhidden for even the briefest of moments and listen to it beat. Perhaps uncover some of the great allure kept so much in the dark.
There is no way to fully depict the woman that burns within your heart and yet soothes it just the same.
She lights you in the morning with sweet eyes of softness, and she ignites you at night with the swaying of her hips and soft fingertips pressed firmly to her lips in a stare that would melt the frozen icecaps of Alaska in the mere beat of her wildfire heart.
There is a romance to her breathing.
This sensual aroma of comfort to her flowing strands of hair.
Her waistline is the playground for many a night spent wrapped around it lovingly. No doubt each night claiming that territory as a province all my own.
You know, the love of romance and the desire for decadence meet in a sultry tango of purity in emotion.
Truth in the heart and just how hard you are.
Her eyes, her hips, and that sweet unforgettable smile will always have me awake at night.
Thinking that tomorrow, the sleepless tonight, and all the moments between now and then, well, they are just moments of silent worship to the art of her.
And how easy it is to love.
May you always find your smile. |
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| Bryan just called me. Wow... |
[Oct. 22nd, 2009|11:57 pm] |
Most of you probably have no idea who Bryan is.
So here is a photo of he and I together, of what used to be a good memory.
He was my best friend. We met in high school, back in 1991. Eventually we became inseparable, and there was truly nothing we would not do for another. I loved him as a brother, and he loved me.
We shared similar interests, though we are polar opposites in a lot of ways. There were times when he was the only person I had and I the only person he did.
However, as always, things eventually change..
Bryan and I stopped speaking three years ago.
Essentially, he lied to me and went behind my back to try and get with this girl he liked that I introduced him to on World of Warcraft. He knew she and I flirted quite a bit, and to this day I'll never understand why he didn't just ask me if he could pursue things with her. I'd have been alright with that.
What he did do, ultimately cost him my friendship. I never spoke to him again once I found out about the lies despite my buddy Michael often encouraging not to let "some girl come between us."
It was never about some girl.
Not then and not now.
I didn't care about the girl. Sure, I liked her, but he was my best friend. He was the person I cared for, and trusted completely and totally. There was nothing I would not have sacrificed for his happiness.
It wasn't the first betrayal. The second in fact.
He had caused problems between us once before, and I stopped speaking to him for over a year. He eventually called me and apologized, and we renewed our friendship.
Everyone deserves a second chance, despite the horrible things he said about me that first time.
The second time, the dishonesty, well, I had a hard time accepting that.
I knew eventually he would just do it again.
One time you really fuck up, okay, sometimes we just make horrible decisions and we learn from them.
Twice you are selfish and show you only care about yourself, well, that's the start of a pattern, and one I wanted no part of.
I had just gotten off the phone with Michael when the phone rang at 10pm tonight. I thought he'd called back and forgotten something.
Instead, "Is Brian there?"
"Yeah. This is him."
"Hey. You know who this is right?"
"Actually, no, who is this?"
"It's Bryan Mentz, you remember me, right?"
"Wow. Yeah."
"I just wanted to say I am sorry, and I don't know, I am sure it isn't repairable, but I miss our friendship, and I would like to be friends again. I just want to say I am sorry."
The conversation went on until now. I guess about an hour and a half.
He's driving in from Texas to New Orleans, and he asked if I'd hang out with him this weekend.
I told him about my surgery, he told me about him becoming a federal agent...
This is strange.
I don't know what to say.
What to think..
Or what to do..
I do know one thing. I often used to say years ago that people may leave my life, but they never forget me. I am indelible that way. I make an impression. A lasting one, in fact.
It got to the point that despite losing contact, ending a relationship or even ending friendships, people always came back. I've been dumped before and they come back realizing their poor decision. I have had friends betray me and I have walked away.
Eventually, no matter how much time and space separates me from them, at some point they come back.
They are sorry.
They want to live again.
I'll be honest, I've had thoughts over these past three years of silence about Bryan. Was I being too hard on him? He had done so much for me and even my family, was it really fair to turn my back on him? Other times I knew full well I was justified and within my rights. That the trust was depleted..
And yet here I am, it's three years later almost to the day since I told him I never wanted to speak to him again..
They always come back.
Wow. |
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| Who did what to your where?! |
[Oct. 19th, 2009|11:20 pm] |
So I am pretty tired right now. Spent much of the day running around the city doing a variety of different things. Went downtown with my mother to the lawyer's office to discuss her car accident case. She was rear-ended at a traffic stop last year on Thanksgiving day and she's had problems ever since. The lawyer wanted to review things one last time before submitting an offer for a claim.
If they don't come to terms she feels are acceptable by November 1st, she's going to file suit.
Anyway, after that we went and did a few things she needed done.
Came home, then my younger brother Thomas said his best friend may come over in a bit. Changed clothes and sure enough Julian came over.
Now, I've been anxious to talk to Julian because I tried fixing the busted pipe under our kitchen sink, and I wasn't able to get a proper seal on the pipes. He's got a fair amount of experience with home repair, so I wanted his advice.
He got here and the three of us ended talking in the living room for a while.
This conversation merits this entry, honestly.
Okay, first things first, Julian comes up with some pretty off-the-wall comments, and he's not afraid to overshare. Some thoughts just aren't censored with him.
However, today might well take the cake.
Julian's living a few blocks down in an apartment his father owns and rents out. It's actually a shotgun double that has a tiny third apartment carved into the back of it.
Anyway, Julian just started dating this girl Samantha. At least I think that's her name. They've known one another a short while, but things seemed okay. Thomas mentioned some girl trouble he had today, but I paid no heed to it..
Julian often has something going on, so it didn't really cross my mind.
Ha. So should have heard Thomas out.. It's priceless!
So, we're sitting there, the TV is on, and Julian says to me with a completely serious expression on his face, "Someone took a dump in the trash can in my bathroom. That's not normal, is it?"
Wait, whaaaaaat?
Who did what in your where?!
Julian proceeds to explain that he had a date tonight, but he had to cancel it. He's been traumatized all day long. You see, he discovered today that someone had wiped their backsides with toilet tissue and deposited it not in the appropriate toilet bowl, but rather his trash receptacle.
He freaked out.
Only three people have used his restroom that could have done it.
Julian.
His father.
His girlfriend.
"I like my girlfriend and all, but if I found out it was her, I was going to have to stop talking to her. That's just not right."
I'm cracking up at this point, because he's getting pretty animated about how awful it was.
Oh, just terrible, I am sure.
So he said he tried to figure out how this could have happened, and after a long while contemplating why his girlfriend might do that, since he knows neither he nor his father behave in such a manner, the thought occurred to him..
Maybe a Mexican did it!
Now, before any of you judge too quickly, (which I avoided, because by this point I'm dying laughing at this leap of reasoning) apparently this is common practice in some parts of Mexico.
Yeah, it seems their sewer lines are much smaller than ours in many places so that you are not allowed to flush anything but your waste down the pipes. It's against the law.
Or something.
Seriously, Julian said, "They have to throw it in the trash basket. And if the basket is full, they throw it on the floor."
Oh. My. God.
Really?
This is so incredibly educational! And really damned funny.
"I couldn't concentrate at all today. Couldn't do any schoolwork. All I could think of was what happened in my bathroom. I nearly threw up just going near it."
Was it the smell?
"No, the thought of it! How awful. I thought maybe Samantha was crazy. I know how it would go, too. 'I mean, I like you, Samantha, but I don't really know you. We just met a month ago,' Oh, I can see it now. That talk. Ugh."
Then I spoke to my father.
I said, "Hey, dad, I think a Mexican took a dump in my bathroom."
His father replied without missing a beat, "I think you're right. In fact I know you are. I let one use your bathroom just the other day, in fact."
...silence...
"You did what?!"
Bwahahaha...
So, yeah, his dad didn't let the guy use his bathroom, nope, took him to Julian's place and allowed him to go in and didn't tell the guy.
But the story wasn't over. Julian is a bit of a hypochondriac...
"And all I keep thinking of how dirty that Mexican is. That I didn't sterilize anything because I didn't know. And then Samantha used my toilet. And I went down on her. It's like I was..."
"No, stop!" I pleaded.
Seriously, this is not transitive here, you didn't do anything of the sort.
"But what if he had something. I'm going to be sick."
So then we got to work on the pipes as I wiped the tears from my eyes. Too damned funny. I did say I felt sorry for him despite my laughter. Not sure if he believed me.
Anyway, I had to make two separate runs to two separate Home Depots (as they each closed just before I got there) to acquire a few things I had been lacking (the proper plastic seals and plumber's putty, then different sized seals)..
And after a couple of hours of labor and chit chat, the pipes in my kitchen sink are fixed.
Julian is grateful he's no longer thinking about the dirty Mexican who violated his bathroom, and I can finally do dishes by hand once again without emptying two buckets every five seconds.
I hope all of you are well.
Best thoughts and prayers go out to my friend Annie who is battling her health, Bren who is doing very much the same, my friend Nicolet and her ill father, and my friend Robin and her sister. Oh, and it can't rain all the time, Karly. Eek, hopefully I didn't miss anyone.
And a happy birthday to Tabetha!
May you always find your smile. |
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| When The Stars Align |
[Oct. 19th, 2009|11:19 pm] |
And sometimes the inspiration comes from the moment when you allow your thoughts to fade and all you can imagine is one picture so very clearly defined..
"When The Stars Align
My eyes turn skyward
Reminding my
Ever wishful thinking
That not all stars
Are always meant to shine
And yet who am I
As I stand here
It seems like
For forever waiting
Imagining your arms
Wrapped around mine
And still I find
I must continue to remind myself
That there are always times
Broken moments
Where these fingers
Feel far too simple
And simply too far away
For you to ever find
Lost between the space
Of who I am with you
Close to my chest
And who I feel like
When you are at home
Within your world
Living your life
So far from mine
Were the world a prism
Your precious lips
Would colour my sky
And your fingertips
While cracked and split
From too much energy
Nervously spent
Would always find home
Intertwined with mine
Your heart would still beat
Those hundred hearts a second
Yet still I would count
The first and the last
And every one I find
Because there exists
Not one magical moment
That can ever compare
To what it is when
You and I surrender
Two hearts
With one rhythm
Oh, what a world of wonder
This life becomes
When the stars align
Brian Milici
October 19, 2009
All I wanna say is this is the best team the Saints have ever had in my lifetime. I'm living on cloud nine every Sunday, and I must confess.. I don't want this ride to end. Not without winning the prize.. but I don't wanna jinx myself. So I'll be quiet. Here's a poem, since I finally found the time to just write..
My prayers still remain with all of you battling each day. I wish you all the best. Truly.
May you always find your smile. |
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| Who did what to your where?! |
[Oct. 14th, 2009|11:26 pm] |
So I am pretty tired right now. Spent much of the day running around the city doing a variety of different things. Went downtown with my mother to the lawyer's office to discuss her car accident case. She was rear-ended at a traffic stop last year on Thanksgiving day and she's had problems ever since. The lawyer wanted to review things one last time before submitting an offer for a claim.
If they don't come to terms she feels are acceptable by November 1st, she's going to file suit.
Anyway, after that we went and did a few things she needed done.
Came home, then my younger brother Thomas said his best friend may come over in a bit. Changed clothes and sure enough Julian came over.
Now, I've been anxious to talk to Julian because I tried fixing the busted pipe under our kitchen sink, and I wasn't able to get a proper seal on the pipes. He's got a fair amount of experience with home repair, so I wanted his advice.
He got here and the three of us ended talking in the living room for a while.
This conversation merits this entry, honestly.
Okay, first things first, Julian comes up with some pretty off-the-wall comments, and he's not afraid to overshare. Some thoughts just aren't censored with him.
However, today might well take the cake.
Julian's living a few blocks down in an apartment his father owns and rents out. It's actually a shotgun double that has a tiny third apartment carved into the back of it.
Anyway, Julian just started dating this girl Samantha. At least I think that's her name. They've known one another a short while, but things seemed okay. Thomas mentioned some girl trouble he had today, but I paid no heed to it..
Julian often has something going on, so it didn't really cross my mind.
Ha. So should have heard Thomas out.. It's priceless!
So, we're sitting there, the TV is on, and Julian says to me with a completely serious expression on his face, "Someone took a dump in the trash can in my bathroom. That's not normal, is it?"
Wait, whaaaaaat?
Who did what in your where?!
Julian proceeds to explain that he had a date tonight, but he had to cancel it. He's been traumatized all day long. You see, he discovered today that someone had wiped their backsides with toilet tissue and deposited it not in the appropriate toilet bowl, but rather his trash receptacle.
He freaked out.
Only three people have used his restroom that could have done it.
Julian.
His father.
His girlfriend.
"I like my girlfriend and all, but if I found out it was her, I was going to have to stop talking to her. That's just not right."
I'm cracking up at this point, because he's getting pretty animated about how awful it was.
Oh, just terrible, I am sure.
So he said he tried to figure out how this could have happened, and after a long while contemplating why his girlfriend might do that, since he knows neither he nor his father behave in such a manner, the thought occurred to him..
Maybe a Mexican did it!
Now, before any of you judge too quickly, (which I avoided, because by this point I'm dying laughing at this leap of reasoning) apparently this is common practice in some parts of Mexico.
Yeah, it seems their sewer lines are much smaller than ours in many places so that you are not allowed to flush anything but your waste down the pipes. It's against the law.
Or something.
Seriously, Julian said, "They have to throw it in the trash basket. And if the basket is full, they throw it on the floor."
Oh. My. God.
Really?
This is so incredibly educational! And really damned funny.
"I couldn't concentrate at all today. Couldn't do any schoolwork. All I could think of was what happened in my bathroom. I nearly threw up just going near it."
Was it the smell?
"No, the thought of it! How awful. I thought maybe Samantha was crazy. I know how it would go, too. 'I mean, I like you, Samantha, but I don't really know you. We just met a month ago,' Oh, I can see it now. That talk. Ugh."
Then I spoke to my father.
I said, "Hey, dad, I think a Mexican took a dump in my bathroom."
His father replied without missing a beat, "I think you're right. In fact I know you are. I let one use your bathroom just the other day, in fact."
...silence...
"You did what?!"
Bwahahaha...
So, yeah, his dad didn't let the guy use his bathroom, nope, took him to Julian's place and allowed him to go in and didn't tell the guy.
But the story wasn't over. Julian is a bit of a hypochondriac...
"And all I keep thinking of how dirty that Mexican is. That I didn't sterilize anything because I didn't know. And then Samantha used my toilet. And I went down on her. It's like I was..."
"No, stop!" I pleaded.
Seriously, this is not transitive here, you didn't do anything of the sort.
"But what if he had something. I'm going to be sick."
So then we got to work on the pipes as I wiped the tears from my eyes. Too damned funny. I did say I felt sorry for him despite my laughter. Not sure if he believed me.
Anyway, I had to make two separate runs to two separate Home Depots (as they each closed just before I got there) to acquire a few things I had been lacking (the proper plastic seals and plumber's putty, then different sized seals)..
And after a couple of hours of labor and chit chat, the pipes in my kitchen sink are fixed.
Julian is grateful he's no longer thinking about the dirty Mexican who violated his bathroom, and I can finally do dishes by hand once again without emptying two buckets every five seconds.
I hope all of you are well.
Best thoughts and prayers go out to my friend Annie who is battling her health, Bren who is doing very much the same, my friend Nicolet and her ill father, and my friend Robin and her sister. Oh, and it can't rain all the time, Karly. Eek, hopefully I didn't miss anyone.
May you always find your smile. |
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| Shayla. The Stories. The Pictures. The Videos... |
[Jul. 23rd, 2009|08:28 pm] |
So I had the absolute good fortune to spend the 4th of July with Shayla. It was a truly splendid time. She once again flew in to spend time with me and check out the Crescent City, except this go round she stayed a full two weeks affording us a much better opportunity to peruse my hometown.
The trip started off a lot better than before as she flew Southwest instead of American Airlines. Southwest not only doesn't charge the $15 checked baggage fee as every other airline does, but they also have first come first served seating and she didn't have to switch flights during her layover in Dallas. She stayed on the same flight from Oklahoma City through Dallas to New Orleans. Less stress during travel is a good thing.
Day One
Anyway, she arrived on July 3rd, and that evening my buddy Mike Smith dropped by and got a chance to meet her. We hung out for a good while and chatted back and forth. Normally I game on Friday nights, but we actually switched it to Sunday since I didn't want to spend her first night doing something other than spending time with her.
Snowballs
We did however snag a snowball on the way home. Ultra Strawberry from my favorite Snowball stand on Airline Highway. The stuff is legendary in my household, and it's addictive. I'm not kidding.
You know, I'm not big into strawberries, but this stuff is so refreshing and tasty.
Shayla said it's basically like a snowcone that she gets back home, only far better.
I think we ended up getting ultra strawberry snowballs four times during her visit as well as a normal snowball from Plum Street near my house which we were all pretty disappointed in. Plum Street Snowballs I grew up on, but the flavors pale in comparison to the Ultra Strawberry. Not only that, but they were far more expensive.
One of our visits to the snowball stand, I basically sold the next customer in line and his girlfriend on buying Ultra Strawberry from him. The guy who runs the stand started smiling as I told his next customer I drive all the way out there from Uptown just for that snowball. Shayla noticed him smiling, I was busy talking. *whistles*
Shayla definitely noticed how much friendlier people are down here. That we interact with each other. Complete strangers talking to one another and all usually positive exchanges. I'm told this is unusual in other places in the country.
My city rocks? ;)
( The Stories. The Pictures. The Videos.. ) |
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| One Year Ago Today |
[Jul. 14th, 2009|08:45 pm] |
One year ago to this very day I woke up at 5 in the morning, got dressed and then drove across Lake Pontchartrain to Southern Surgical Hospital in Slidell, Louisiana.
There I underwent my surgery.
Many of you might recall it was a successful procedure and I was out in three days.
Then not two days after my release I was in emergency surgery. No one knew what was wrong, except all along I told them I was in incredible amounts of pain. The nurse constantly assured me it was normal.
I have a high tolerance for pain. My threshold for discomfort is significant, I knew something was wrong, but I didn't know how wrong.
They discovered a staple ruptured inside of me, and my body was going septic.
I was dying.
They brought me back.
After several more days I was again moving myself onto the cold steel of the operating table, lying awake as doctors and nurses moved about my body like mechanics on a car requiring an oil change as they placed the anesthesia into my IV.
Blackness overtook me.
I lost sense of everything around me.
There was only the overwhelming spectre of darkness to keep me company.
In a way I was lost in the void of consciousness, but without the capacity to recall anything I may have thought during those moments.
What I do know is this past year has been a gift to me.
As so many of the people in my life are.
Treasures to behold.
Never take for granted.
Always appreciate what you have..
Because fortune may well not be in your favor and it might all be gone.
In one precious instant a life forever changed.
Reality not at all the same.
Thank you to everyone who endured my five week ordeal with me. Thank you for lighting candles, sending me cards and care packages, for not giving up hope. Thank you for the prayers and positive thoughts.
Honestly, it means the world to me, because that is all I have now.
Every single day.
The world.
And truly there is no gift greater than that.
When you close your eyes wondering that you may never again awaken and open them to the light of this world.. things change.
Perspective gained?
Perhaps altered.
Put into focus for certain.
I know not if I am a better person today than I was then, but I do know I am better for having you all in my life. Those of you that are still in it.
Things have changed for me. My life is better. Some people, as always, have come and gone. Left my life.
They are no more.
There have been new people I have encountered as well. Precious souls to behold as far as my eye can tell.
And then there have been some who have re-entered my life. Surprises abound.
Thank you for those that remain.
You endure as I do, and that to me is truly extraordinary.
Ironically a word that so often isn't.
May you always find your smile.
Always,
Brian |
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| Finally Found |
[Jul. 1st, 2009|02:20 am] |
And sometimes the inspiration comes from clearing my mind of all which does not matter, and only thoughts of you abound..
"Finally Found"
I find you at midnight
When my mind refuses rest
While the stars glitter effortlessly
Just as your sparkling eyes do
In the late night hour of lovers
Where I hide my deepest feelings
That I long now to confess
You see my motives are imprisoned
There is a knot within my chest!
It forms when your voice fades
As your body gives way
To the solitude of slumber
And only does it ever loosen
When a smile finds your sweet lips
Do you not see, my love
There exists no magic moment
Not a formula that can be found
As my life feels all too empty
Whenever you are not around
Your love is not for mistaking
As never is it easily granted
Your eyes reflect motes of possibility
While never forms when forever
Meets for always, darling
And the two fail to understand
Your heart is the holiest of holy
Oh, your body is sacred ground
I would sacrifice my own sanity
Just to spend one night more
Chasing one another
Until our worlds collide
And these stars realign
As it is only then,
My dearest of hearts,
That we are both
Finally found
© Brian Milici
June 30, 2009
Thank you again to everyone who worked on my birthday diary. I tried to note each and every one of you for your entries and contributions. I've been ridiculously busy though and have yet to construct an entry to do you all the justice which such an effort deserves.
On a personal note, Shayla will be flying in on Friday for her second visit, and I can hardly stem my enthusiasm. I'm delighted that we will get to see the Battle of the Barges on the 4th, and it cannot get here quickly enough.
Honestly, there's a whole lot more going on in my life, but I just don't have the time or desire to discuss it. I hope you all are doing well.
May you always find your smile. |
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| Eye of the Tiger! |
[Jun. 24th, 2009|11:48 pm] |
"Eye of the Tiger" by Survivor
Thanks for the idea of adding the song, Shayla. heh. :D
So..
Tonight LSU defeated Texas to claim its 6th National Championship in baseball! That now ties LSU for second all-time in college baseball titles with Texas. USC owns the top spot with 12 baseball championships.
Yes, Southern Cal has 12 titles. Texas and LSU each now have 6..
LSU baseball is back after a rough go of it following legendary Coach Skip Bertman's retirement. Skip led LSU to all five of their previous championships and is one of the true greats in the history of the game. Current LSU Coach Paul Mainieri has restored the program back to its epic heights. And we're proud of him.
Just to put LSU baseball in perspective..
The all-time leader in college baseball averaged 400 fans in attendance to their home games this year. Yes, USC with 12 titles only drew in 400 fans at home.
LSU? They led the nation yet again in attendance. The average home crowd for LSU baseball was 9,600 (no one else averaged more than 7,000!). Yes, that means LSU brought in over 400,000 people to their home games this year. That's incredible in college baseball.
LSU LSU LSU!
It is good to be a Tiger. |
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| We Remain, My Birthday, A New Diary |
[Jun. 13th, 2009|08:30 pm] |
And sometimes the inspiration comes from thinking you just might inspire, inspire and change..
"We Remain"
I am but a vague notion
A promise never made
Thoughts of a tomorrow
Perhaps and possibility
That never quite stayed
You are a striking chord
The softest of all melody
With passion and purpose
Direction while uncertain
That never ceases to amaze
Were I only the lamp
You would be my base
Were Heaven truly a kingdom
You would be the gates
Were my eyes like Summer
You would be the days
Were stars just the guide
You would be the place
Were love an amplifier
You would be the bass
Were our hearts flowers
You and I, would-be lovers
We would become explorers!
On the expedition of forever
With resolution and promise
In the search for completion
The promise of forever!
Not just a phrase
Together, you and I
Would-be lovers
With promises of tomorrow
And notions of forever
Worth naught at all
If we exist not together,
So together forever
We promise
We remain
© Brian Milici
June 13, 2009
So today is my birthday.
Gaming was great last night. The current campaign concluded, and Dimble didn't die! His future is whatever I want it to be more or less as we can currently rewrite reality. Sort of like reset the world as we want it. I can choose to have my own Kingdom or even ascend to Godhood. Speaking of which, since the campaign ended I will start running the game next week in a world I created.
Anyway, after I got home I received an amazing gift from many of my close friends here on OD.. a diary made in my honor and completed by numerous of my favs. The diary name, of course, is Promise Him Forever. It's a good name, don't you think? heh. Anyway, I am still sifting through it, but I ran across the poetry section and I was startled to find some really good poetry I apparently helped inspire. For that, well, I am astonished and truly inspired myself..
Here is the end result.
A poem.
In any event, I must get going now and watch LSU hopefully win our first game in the College World Series. Hope the best to all of you and thanks to Annie and Randi specifically for the diary entries wishing me happy birthday. Thanks to Shayla and Annie and Robin for the birthday cards. Thanks to Shayla for the birthday gifts and Annie as well. Thank you to everyone who wished me happy birthday with calls and texts and the such..
I'll go into further detail about the birthday diary and all of those who blew me away with their work in it in a later entry. For now, here's a link to the diary but I'm only making public one entry out of the 73 total since I'm not sure what all everyone is okay with being seen. :)
Promise Him Forever
May you always find your smile. |
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| Annie's Visit |
[Jun. 9th, 2009|12:32 am] |
Hey. How are all of you crazy kids out there? Today was amazingly lovely as I had the good fortune to enjoy the rain and actually be somewhat productive. It was also my first time being alone in over a week, and let me tell you, there's something to be said for that. Sometimes you just wanna do things by yourself..
Okay, wait, I take that back. First, it sounded awfully wrong and could be interpreted in so many different ways..
I like my me time? How about that?
Whatever! Anyway, good news.
First, LSU made it to the College World Series! I know, how awesome right? We play Virginia this Saturday night on my birthday of all days.
Secondly, it's my birthday Saturday. Annie got me the latest Better Than Ezra album called Paper Empire, and I adore it mightily. Also, she got me a book on LSU football which contains stats and other glorious trivia bits for me to mull over before the fall begins and the gridiron is occupied once more. I heart them..
Finally, this girl visited me recently. Her name is Annie. And I gotta tell you, folks, between you and me she's pretty cool.
Oh, you came here for that last part? Just to hear all about it? That means you actually want to be bored with the details of my ever exciting life, doesn't it? Well, I aim to please..
So I met Annie in the airport. She actually confused me a bit as two Southwestern flights landed at the same time and they have two baggage claims and I was waiting at the other one. She texted me and was like I'm here dude, and I'm all perplexed looking around trying to figure out how I missed her..
I didn't. Oh my lord is she short! And her voice is even more high-pitched in person, so I like swept her up in a big hug right away and protected her like the small child she apparently is.
Well, she's 25, but she's tiny. And I'm macho. So, yeah, I was on bodyguard duty because these idiots always push on you to get to the luggage before they realize they're a moron and picked up the wrong bag and put it back on the conveyor belt hoping nobody noticed oh but I noticed and I mocked you openly, yes, yes I did..
Right, so we went home, but first we grabbed a snowball, and it was amazing. Truly. I'm addicted to them. Good stuff, man, good stuff.
That evening we relaxed and I forced Annie to watch some wrestling matches with me because it's rare for me to find anyone let alone a girl who actually enjoys pro wrestling (yes, it's fake, I know) and understands it. Pretty cool stuff.
Then we basically spent the week taking care of my puppies, going out to eat at amazingly yummy restaurants, shopping and also watching Supernatural.
My favorite television show. I sent her season one for Christmas, and so we actually got through seasons two and three so she could see the opening episode of season four before she left. It was unexpected, I hadn't planned on watching the show at all, but she seemed to like it.
Also, we watched a couple episodes of her Jim Henson's Storytellers DVD which was actually very fascinating stuff. Based on German and Russian folklore, I wish we had had enough time to see all of the shorts as I enjoyed them immensely.
I also got to see a bunch of her pictures she brought with her. That was neat to put faces to names finally, as she talks often about these people.
Friday night was gaming.
It sucked. Hard.
Dimble got royally screwed. I'm not happy at all. She mocked me in front of the gaming guys. So not cool..
We actually went out to eat at Casa Garcia with Michael. That was neat. She seemed to like him well enough. He's a cool guy.
There was one hysterically funny moment at gaming where I had everyone laughing but Pick.. oh man. So funny. Good times, good times. I yelled at him and had everyone dying laughing to the point that for the rest of the night Ian kept making references back to my joke.
I finally got awarded a skill point for it.
Sadly, Rob was not there to enjoy my humor.
You know I think the only gaming buddy Annie did not care for was Bill, which I found fascinating.
By the way, yes, we made it down to the French Quarter. We ate beignets and walked along the river, saw the Natchez, and then walked along Bourbon Street for a bit.
In that short span of time we saw cockroaches aplenty, public urination (some guy with two girls all quite drunk stopped to pee in a public trashcan, nice huh?), public vomit, and some loud black guy telling me "I'm the man" and that "I got it going on" because Annie is so hot..
I am not making that up.
She kept saying it was going in her entry, so I am preemptive striking here by mentioning it in my own diary first. pffft.
I do not have it going on, but yes, I am the man.
I was already aware, kimosabee.
Anyway, you guys all wanted pictures, but Annie is loathe to appear in them, and so I have very few to share, but here are some you might enjoy..
Sam looking as majestic as ever on my bed.
Sam and Dean asleep on my bed. Aren't they so peaceful? And yes, they are exactly as their characters.
Sam is quite emo, and Dean loves the ladies. I kid you not.
He's all about the women.. every chick he meets he loves.
I raised him right.
Dean wants face time. So cute.
Ohh, cuter. Dean just supersized his cute meal.
The skyline as seen from my backyard. God must be an artist.
I really need a haircut. Because we all know girls like guys with shaved heads.
At least that's what I tell myself.
In the French Quarter getting beignets at Cafe du Monde.. Annie's smile.
Some poor waiter I about blinded with the ridiculous flash on her little pink monster of death.
Her camera is pink. Seriously. How can I man up using that? You can't.
I still tried, though.
An order of beignets which are French style doughnuts. They're amazing.
Obviously they take after me.
This is along the staircase up to the river. I told her she had to let me take a picture.
She tried to refuse. I won.
That's actually the river in the background. It's so pretty at night.
And so easy to just push someone in.. *whistles*
She actually insisted on this picture because she likes the pretty flowers.
Apparently pink is something of her color. Girls. Go figure.
The Natchez riverboat live and in color. It's actually much more magnificent in person.
You don't really get a feel for the impressive size and lovely details of its structure with this photo.
And yes, I've used that line before. *gasps*
This is the back of St. Louis Cathedral.. you can't see it unfortunately but the statue in the background with its arms raised up has a spotlight beneath it that casts a shadow of the statue on the back of the cathedral which looks amazing from blocks away..
Speaking of amazing from blocks away. Let's find a picture of me!
Or not..
Wow.
I really need that haircut, don't I?
This is the real holy trinity of middle eastern food. Falaffel, hummus, and grape leaves.
This is heaven, people. Absolutely delectable.
Aw, isn't she all cute in her "I'm only smiling because I can't hit you" kinda look?
Oh dude, I got the haircut. Isn't it better now?
Not really? Fuck you, too.
*whistles*
Annie was perplexed that we have trees growing out of the embankment of the river.
I wasn't. Because I've seen rivers before.
Check out the tugboats on the other side.
I'd so toot their horn if I could.
So this is it. The ever cliche airport goodbye picture.
Blue is totally my color. She still likes pink.
And it was a fun visit.
One I shall always remember.
Hope everyone is doing well.
May you always find your smile. |
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| My Compass |
[May. 28th, 2009|01:12 am] |
After much back and forth and a tremendous creative tug-of-war this was a poem co-written by Shayla and I. For those keeping track at home, I won the battle, but I fear in so doing I may have just lost the war.. ;)
And sometimes the inspiration comes from thoughts and wants undone..
"My Compass"
Her hands fumble at the frays
Of her autumn colored skirt
As her mind sketches the possibilities
That may someday become her memories
A life torn from the precious pages
Of her very favorite storybook
He wraps himself in the way she felt
Imagining that it is her touch
And her scent that still lingers
Despite tangled sheets left unkempt
Adorning an otherwise empty bed
Where only her body belongs
And it is when I am at a loss
Without thought and without direction
I turn toward the waning moonlight
Cradling in my arms your written promises
That is when I discover I need not
The skyline to find my way
Your kiss is my Northern Star
You are my compass
And in your arms, I find my place
© Brian Milici
© Shayla Herren
May 27, 2009
Feedback adored.
May you always find your smile. |
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| The Art of Colour |
[May. 27th, 2009|02:34 am] |
I am currently addicted to another new amazing Better Than Ezra song.
This one is called "Turn Up The Bright Lights" and the lyrics (sorta) can be found here.
No, this song has nothing to do with the poem I wrote. *coughTabzcough*
I just love it and I figured I would share.
"Turn on the mystery
There's no other place to be
It's only you and me
Beneath this perfect sky"
I heart that.
And sometimes the inspiration comes from the way she makes me want to express the heart..
"The Art of Colour"
Tonight, darling
Sleep evades me
A mercurial creature
If ever there existed
In the dark of night
I can feel my pulse
Oh, how it quickens
When around you, love,
I am but a blank canvas
For your delicate brush
Won't you colour me
With those perfect strokes
As there can be
No greater an experience
For any starving artist
Than to be held by your
Slender fingertips
Oh, to feel your touch
Will you not paint me
Some magnificent mosaic
Perhaps draw me upon
An undiscovered stone wall
A mural of intensity
Depicting my passion
My want, my desire
For I can hold no candle
In these billowing winds
That would ever dare
Hope to shine as bright
As bright as your eyes
You see, love, stars
They guide sailors
Lost upon rocky waves
Finding their way
In the dark of night
Yet these eternal beacons
While they shine
Ever so brightly
They glow so very dim
When I look at you
When I see your smile
You are the truth,
An unspoken beauty!
That makes the pallor
Of this wicked life
Somehow subside
When the art of colour
Longs for safe harbor
It is in your arms
And in your warm heart
That such beauty
Shall always reside
© Brian Milici
May 27, 2009
Feedback adored.
May you always find your smile. |
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| The Perfect Love (Short Story) |
[May. 19th, 2009|06:16 pm] |
Note: You probably shouldn't be reading this if you're under eighteen, whistles.
"The Perfect Love"
"You know, you're a bad influence on me," she sighed.
Then she punched him in the arm playfully. Initially, she went into the store to buy a pair of work pants, and instead they had lingered far too long in the lingerie section (surprise, surprise) of JC Penny where she delighted all too much in trying on various outfits and teasing him with the possible results.
The payback was ultimately in the bill she then had to face, as the receipt took forever to scroll out of the machine. That and that he would reap the benefits of her purchase. Though, secretly, she always did enjoy the various looks of desire she inspired on his face. He would not be alone in enjoying the purchase.
A smile as broad as those you'd find it Arizona crossed his face. He almost sheepishly responded, "Well, I have faced many daring accusations in my time, but none as hurtful as this one.."
Before he could finish his thought, she put her lips to his. Softly they kissed for a moment, until finally she pulled away, though not really wanting to.
The puzzled expression he gave her asked the question he need not voice.
"What? It's the only way I can get you to shutup sometimes."
He swatted at her, but she deftly avoided the poorly coordinated attempt for contact. She grinned back at him, using the most mischievous of smiles in her repertoire. And to him, she had many. A full arsenal at her disposal of statements made with those tender lips he simply could never get enough of.
"Just wait. This feisty side of yours? Cute, sure, but it'll catch up to you one of these days," he warned her.
"Oh really? You can't even catch me, how can it?"
Feigning a look of horror, he mockingly gasped.
"Can so."
She shook her head, again doubting him.
"Fine. I do so love a challenge. Care to wager on this, pretty lady?"
Her eyes narrowed. Rarely did he do anything without thought, and he knew she was certainly not the type to gamble. Betting on anything simply wasn't within her. While she enjoyed brief interludes with her competitive side, rarely was it anything more than occasional mingling.
"No, that's quite alright."
"So then you admit to it," he remarked.
"Admit to what?" she countered.
"You know I can catch you."
"I never said that."
"Actions speak louder than words, darling."
He was met with her glare.
It was then at this point that he knew he had her. The worse part? She knew it, too. Which infuriated her, but she tried to not let on.
"No, you can't catch me. I'm too quick for you."
Now, he would admit that her small frame allowed for her superior movement, but there was one thing he wasn't telling her as they made their way to the parking lot from the seaside mall. Somehow they had once again managed to avoid going in more than one store on their visit inside of the cavernous warehouse.
It became almost tradition.
"Well, I have something other than quicks, you see. I'll win, rest assured."
Again, her eyes constricted. He was up to something, but she was feeling unusually adventurous, a stark contrast to her typically demure nature.
"You can't beat me," she offered confidently.
His smile stayed on his face, so smug and full of himself. "Oh, darling, but I already have. That is unless you truly are afraid, which is understandable. Rarely does anyone engage in a battle of wits with me and leave unscathed. Certainly not without some measure of fear.."
Another punch landed, this time a little less playful.
The smile, however, stayed. He rubbed his arm. That time he felt it. Another inch closer to success, he considered.
"Afraid of you? I'm going to enjoy seeing you fall off that high horse. You're on." she said, slightly annoyed.
He thought a moment, and then he spoke deliberately.
"Okay, I win, and you have to do everything I want for a night. Without hesitation. No arguments. You have to be completely bent to my will, and I'm so going to enjoy every moment of it."
She rolled her eyes, "You're mind ever leave the gutter?"
He shook his head.
"You should see my mortgage each month. It's a steal."
Truthfully, one might be concerned with such a demand fearing for what they might be forced to do, but she knew him all too well and the way he thought. He was trying to get her to do everything he wanted for an entire night, well, he had another thing coming.
She just needed the perfect punishment for his overconfidence.
Then it struck her.
"Okay, I know what I want."
He turned to look at her, almost surprised. "You're actually going to bother stating your stake? Why? You've already lost."
This time, he sidestepped the full brunt of her punch, but that didn't stop him from continuing to rub his shoulder while still carrying the various items of lust in the plastic bag cradled in his fingers.
"Have not. I'm going to win. You can't catch me even if you wanted to. I'll wait you out until you give up. And I do know what I want."
Intrigued, he asked her what it was.
"You have to go out dancing with me. One night. As many places as I want. And you have to dance to every song I want. My choice. My songs. My clubs."
This time the horror was pure and unfiltered.
A low blow to be sure.
"Thank the Lord I don't make bets with you often, especially ones where I don't know for sure I've won them," he said.
( The Rest of the Story )
Feedback adored.
May you always find your smile. |
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| The Life of Brian |
[May. 12th, 2009|09:47 pm] |
So I just had one heck of an eventful past week. Really, who thought *I* of all people would have much to talk about, right? You would think I'd be dulling your minds with some grandiose poem or using my inclination to be slightly verbose with some maddening memory... Naw.
Not today. Instead, I figured you might as well see some of the Life of Brian, to steal a little bit of thunder from the glory that is Monty Python.
Logan vs. James Tiberius Kirk
Last Tuesday I went with my brothers to see Wolverine. I don't normally go out of my way to check out a movie in the theaters anymore, but this was a must. The weekend price for a movie here is $9.50, which I find criminal, but the saving grace is that on Monday through Thursday all showings are only $4.75.. and Wolverine was worth every penny. (Even if you don't think so, Sinead, it totally was! Bite your tongue, woman. whistle.)
I was really pleased that they included Kestrel, Zero, Deadpool, Blob, etc from Wolverine's past. The symmetry between Logan and Victor Creed I found fascinating, and the small touches they did with explaining certain names of characters (from Wolverine which was totally awesome to Gambit to the Blob..) I thought was really well done and underplayed. Why the critics are totally panning this movie, I do not know. There were two major gaffes though from a comic book to film perspective. That of course being Silverfox being Emma Frost's sister (Annie, put down your pitchfork, k?) and Deadpool having all of those powers. He's an incredible martial artist and epic swordsman, and he does have regenerative powers to regrow limbs, but he doesn't have the accumulation of all those powers.
Steve came up with a concept that would work. Theyr'e supposed to do a Deadpool movie, and the doctor even says that the bonding process wasn't complete, so they could explain away why Deadpool had all of those powers by saying the abilities fade. They don't stick with him because the bonding process was rushed and interrupted. I hope so, because I do like keeping the characters true to their comic book counterparts.
Anyway, the film is well worth seeing. I had worried going into it that it wouldn't live up to the hype, but to me it exceeded it. I thought it was better than any of the X-Men films, which I felt were pretty good until director Bryan Singer abruptly abandoned the franchise (and X3, grumble) to direct Superman Returns, which then sucked... Karma anyone? I think so!
But I digress.. heh.
Then on Thursday night we went to the 10 o'clock showing of the new Star Trek franchise. Look, I'll come clean now. I was always more of a Star Wars fan myself, hence why my family to this day refers to me as Obi, but I did watch all of the Star Trek shows and the films. Well, except Voyager. God, did that show suck. Hard. I swear, you'd think it got lessons on sucking from Jenna Jameson it was so adept at it.. Seriously. Bad.
My favorite of the Trek shows was actually Deep Space Nine, but unfortunately that show was the least liked amongst Trekkies (or Trekkers, whatever those nerds go by these days.. I know, pot.kettle.black, shut it..) because they actually had three-dimensional characters maybe. Go figure.
Star Trek was awesome.
Amazing.
Phenomenal.
I had very very low expectations going in (even though I'm a fan of Orci and Kurtzman and their work on Transformers and The Fringe as well as JJ Abrams involvement in Lost and The Fringe) because the franchise had suffered so many blows and was damaged so much..
They kicked ass. Every casting decision was spot on.
There was more character development in Kirk and Spock in this one movie than there was in all three seasons of the original show and all six movies they appeared in together. Just excellent.
It was also hilarious! Non-stop laughter, really. I actually want to go see this movie again..
As much as it pains me to admit this, Star Trek was a much better film than my beloved Wolverine. And I had been waiting five years to see Wolverine (Hugh Jackman signed on to do X3 *and* a Wolverine film so before X3 was filming I was impatiently waiting to see Wolverine! Also, they filmed a few scenes in New Orleans.. I liked how they portrayed Gambit.. my brothers didn't.. what did you all think?).. and Trek was clearly just a much better film.
I'm stoked to see the following films in the theater this summer: Terminator Salvation, G.I. Joe, and Transformers 2.. This summer really is unusually loaded with movies I'm looking forward to seeing.. I love it.
Anyway..
Surgery News
Wednesday I met with my surgeon for the first time in about four months. It was a check-up, and I was really nervous about it as I didn't know what he would say. I've lost officially 133.5 pounds in nine months, which he seemed quite pleased with. He did explain to me that what I had done is only limiting my intake, nothing else, and it's not a viable option for long-term goals. My surgeon, Dr. Clark Warden, is quite skilled and very stoic. He said to me, "After the diaster that was your first surgery, it would take great encouragement to get me to go back inside you." He said it with a wry smile almost. I found it highly amusing.
Eventually though he did say we would need to either go ahead with the gastric bypass or the second part of the duodenal switch (which I prefer to the bypass, personally), but he wanted to give me more time to heal and lose weight.
I asked how much time, and he said at least six months, more close to a year. I was fine with that. Works for me. It sets back some things I'd like to accomplish, yes, but this is the long road I've worked so hard to finally get onto, I need to play it smart.
Then he did tell me that we wouldn't be able to do those laparascopically (cameras and lasers, minimally invasive), he'd have to open my chest back up to do it.
I asked why.
He explained that due to the internal damage and scarring inside of me, that all of my organs are stuck together. Normally that is not the case. He mentioned that our organs generally float around inside of us somewhat freely, like a bunch of worms inside of a jar you slosh around. My insides are a jar of worms with a can of super glue poured inside. They're stuck together and he'd have to physically move them out of the way to operate. Hence no lasers and cameras. Eventually, he commented that my organs will loosen up some, just not enough..
I said, "Oh, wow, so that sounds like a complication. Like it will make this harder on you."
Dr. Warden actually laughed a bit, and he responded, "No, it'll make it harder on you."
"You remember how difficult it was being opened up the first time and how tough it was treating the wound afterward. That's what you'll be facing."
Understood. I'll kick its ass. I'm doing really well.
Nothing will stop me, I assure you. :)
Oh! I also worked on my brother's computer, which has been glitching for over a year now, and during the turmoil that was my three hour long duel with it, I was able to get it to work. Once it booted up and XP finally loaded properly, I noticed he had some photos on his desktop.
Brazenly, I clicked on them while mentally thinking to myself, "Pleasedon'tbenakedphotosPleasedon'tbenakedphotosPleasedon'tbenakedphotos" and I was surprised at what I found.
They were pictures he took of me while I was in the hospital.
Before that day last week I had never seen these before.
So I figured I might share them here with any who are interested to see them. I won't actually post them because they're not very flattering and not so pleasant to look at my wounds, but it was when I had the ventilator in me after the emergency surgery where I was dying and I was recovering in the ICU.
I tried to add some humor into the captions. I hope someone can at least appreciate that, if anyone has the gumption to look. Not me! No thanks. No how.
Here's the links to the post-op photos of me in the ICU recovery:
Plug him up!
Darth Vader!
Vader hater!
You got knocked the F out!
It's alive!
Chest wound. Not pretty.
Anyone notice a difference between me then and me now? heh..
Yeah, me too. *grins*
Gaming Audio
Oh! And so I told you guys about a gaming story in one of my previous entries, right?
So I am in line to run the next game once Michael (aka Pick) is finished running this current campaign. One of my ideas was to use my mp3 player's voice recording feature to record my gaming sessions. However, I wasn't sure if the mp3 player I had was suitable for it or if I should invest in an actual digital sound recorder..
Well, I think it actually turned out pretty well. The voices you hear most distinctly are Michael's, my own, and Rob's because we're actually sitting right next to the mp3 player. Ian is at the other end of the table, while Eddie and Bill are off to the right hanging around. So they are a bit more difficult to discern.
In any event, I have uploaded both parts to the session.
We actually only role-played for four hours, which is the bare minimum we go. This is unedited and contains any conversations had both in-game and out-of-character. There are some funny moments. This is a look into the Saturday night of a true nerd. Dungeons and Dragons. How deplorable, I know..
Voices and their owners (and who their characters are in italics):
Note: All of these times are as soon as you load the first part of the gaming session.
Michael (The Dungeon Master): Michael runs the entire campaign and sets the stage for everything we encounter be it places or people. He wears the hats of everyone we interact with. He controls the story outside of what we players do..
Michael is the first voice you hear, he goes on to describe rain forests..
Ian (Mr. Bear): Yes, he's a walking talking demon-heart-eating enormous bear. We call him the Demon Bear. He joined us last session with Blackroot.
Around 23 seconds Ian says, "Hey, that's what that looks like!"
Rob (Thell): His story is that Thell was a young human who wandered into a red dragon's cave. He hid from the dragon, then heard some adventurers going to slay her hatchlings. He warned the dragon, and as a reward the red took him in. His eye contains the soul of one of the red hatchling dragons and this red aids him. Neat story.
Right after Ian says that, Rob talks about a bird of paradise and tapping it for mana, I am guessing that's a Magic: The Gathering joke, but I wouldn't know. Maybe some of you other nerds can help me out here? (Later on he mentions watermelons. Rob forgot his character sheet so Pick asks for it knowing he didn't have it. Funny part, but I am jumping ahead..)
Brian: Dimbleroot Taylor. Halfling rogue. Duke in two Kingdoms. Citizen of the Dragon Isles. Controller of the vaunted BlackGuard. Married to Chara the Silver Dragon.
At the 40 second mark, I question, "What are you talking about?"
Becuase *I* was trying to stay in character.. *coughs*
Eddie: Alex. He's a solar aka an angel of the good Goddess Sera. Most of us dislike Sera.
Eddie says, "That one right there." at the 1:30 mark..
Bill: Sadly he is Blackroot Taylor. My son. He's an assassin. Half-halfling and half-silver dragon.. I call him a quarterling. heh.
At the 1:35 mark Bill says, "That's the chick Ian just picked up.."
(They play a Star Wars role-playing game on like Wednesday nights)
Audio Links:
Gaming - May 9, 2009 Part One.
Gaming - May 9, 2009 Part Two.
The download site is Rapidshare.com and it is very clean, fast, and effective. I use it every single day and it kicks ass. It is free to use, though you may be prompted to put in a small code and wait 45 seconds or so before the download will begin.. You need not worry about any spyware or anything from that site. It's legit and clean.
You should at least listen to the two minute mark, there's something funny then in the first part not involving gaming.
Anyway, there's a very funny moment at the 106 minute mark of the second audio. The comedy part ends at the 109 minute mark. heh. Michael's laughter is outrageous.
Basically the setup is that we're going into the capital city of the Kingdom of Traste known as Shai'Dar. I am a Duke there. I am also a Duke in the Kingdom of Triel. The joke centers around the fact my character, the halfling Dimbleroot Taylor, went around constantly touting that he was a Duke in two separate Kingdoms, quite an achievement. In the previous campaign when I achieved this I began to refer to myself as "The Double Duke!" and honestly, I was rather obnoxious about it.
We're going to Shai'Dar in disguise so as not to draw attention to ourselves, and we're talking about disguises we can use to appear normal. Someone disses my dukedom then I make a joke about Eddie and then he totally slams me back. Hard. It's funny. I hope you enjoy..
That part is worth listening to even if you're not into the whole Dungeons and Dragons role-playing thing.
I've always viewed role-playing as a story you're writing.
A novel that the individual players are helping to pen themselves. The storyteller or dungeon master (Michael in this instance) sets up the events before us, but we as characters decide where that story goes in relation to us. Take your favorite book and imagine playing one of the main characters and the author of the novel setting the stage for the world around you and playing all of the characters that you interact with.
It's pretty neat, at least in my view..
Other News
In other news, this summer should prove even more interesting..
On May 31st of this month, I finally get to meet in person my longtime friend Annie whom I first encountered four years ago right here on OpenDiary of all places. She's one of my closest friends, and one of the more prolific personalities I've ever encountered and I am very much looking forward to that. We'll spend a week together doing only God knows what. I'm sure she'll find some way to keep us entertained since I'm a little on the dull side.. heh.
Then on June 13th (my lucky number) it will be my birthday.
I'll be older. Wiser. Older. And ugh. Older. Did I mention that? Enough of the pain!
Not long after that I get to see Shayla again! That should be really fun. She'll be here on July 3rd and is staying two weeks this time, so she'll be here for the fourth and also get to spend time with me on the one-year anniversary of my surgery (July 14th) which coincidentally is the day we'll celebrate Sam and Dean's birthday.
Aw, my puppies. I loves them.
Sam is all black, Dean has the Saints colors.. black and gold, baby!
Speaking of pets, Michael's cute little girl Shadow is growing up. Here she is saying goodbye to us as we go off to gaming this past Saturday..
Also, Happy Birthday to Nicolet! She's one of the sweetest people on the planet and her warmth and kindness has touched me from the moment I met her through the ordeal of Hurricane Katrina and into my surgery and beyond.. You can wish her a happy birthday here.
Oh, I almost forgot.. today is the release of Better Than Ezra's new album Paper Empire which I will be receiving for my birthday from Annie. Their single "Absolutely Still" from the new CD is freaking amazing. I'm in love with it. I just thought you all should know. heh.
I hope that all of you are alive and well.. that's about it aside from some drama I was able to rectify.
So I shall leave you all now with a little bit of lame.
Live long and prosper. ;)
May you always find your smile. |
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| Far Away |
[May. 10th, 2009|04:19 pm] |
And sometimes the inspiration comes from the truth, the pain, and from learning once again..
"Far Away"
On the eighteenth of July
Year two thousand and eight
I felt my life slipping
It was slipping
Slipping away
And still not one year full
To that very painful day
Life has found me
In good health
And in good fortune
Yet now she's taking it!
Taking it!
She's taking it away!
Memories of wicked cold metal
On a table I was laid to pray
Thoughts of you and of losing
All those words that built up deep
Deep inside of me
That I might never get to say..
And still not one year full
From that horror
That God-awful pain
I find myself reliving
That I'm dying
I'm dying
And you are the cause!
You are the dagger!
And this time, dear
Good fortune?
Shall not find us
As with your heart
It seems she is locked up
So very tight
Far, far away
© Brian Milici
May 10, 2009
Happy Mother's Day.
May you always find your smile. |
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| Conquered |
[May. 1st, 2009|06:42 am] |
love will overcome
if this love will make us men
love will draw us in
to take our fear away,
wipe our tears away!
"Sparkle" by Live
Sometimes it's hard to sleep at night.
Usually it is, to be honest.
Tonight? Nigh impossible.
Not really sure what it is. What it was. I had a really good day. I had an even better night. Things are starting to fall into place for me, even though I have a few hurdles coming up.
However, sleep eludes me. That's alright.
I'm used to it.
What I am not accustomed to is this. This feeling.
Right now.
I'm crying.
Tears streaming down my face.
For some reason I decided to face something I just haven't really wanted to for a long time now.
As many of you know, last July was pretty hectic for me. One of my closest friends, Shayla, she made a video for me upon my return home. It was touching in ways I cannot really explain. It meant a lot to me, and I've taken to watching it lately.
I watched it tonight.
Another of my closest friends, Annie, well she went out of her way during that ordeal. She kept everyone updated as best she could during my vacation in the hospital. (And for those keeping track at home, I give my experience 5 stars! ... Out of a hundred. heh.)
Well, when I got out, she did me the honor of compiling two Word documents. One contained all of the entries she wrote regarding me. The other was a compilation of every entry people I was close to and even some strangers wrote about me.
Honestly, I couldn't read either.
It's just not something I have allowed myself to read. Absorb it.
Relive it.
Whatever you want to call it.
Well, tonight I read it. All 52 pages of that document detailing every entry she made regarding me, and there were quite a few.
I even learned some things I went through that I truly do not remember.
And at times, I learned some things about myself I don't know if I was ready to face.
If I'll ever be ready to for that matter.
And the tears began. Soft and slow at first.
They would dry, though. Time would pass.
Though the teardrops would return.
Until it was unrelenting. I was without control. Sitting here knowing everything. Thinking about it. About myself. My life. All those that I love. Everything I wish I could change.
How I was supposed to change.
I was going to be different.
Prepare yourself for it.
I do not know if I am.
Some closest to me see it. Some do not.
And I just don't know what to say or to think.
Though I assure you, I feel it.
I feel it all.
These tears are proof of that.
And so I'll return my head to the pillow, allow sleep one more chance to engage me on this seemingly unending night.
Sweet dreams to you whenever they find you.
The sweetest of dreams to us all.
Consider that when every tear has finally fallen, there is always a tomorrow to discover. And each and every tomorrow shall forever represent a chance to love.
And love..
She conquers all. |
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| Shadows of the Heart |
[Apr. 29th, 2009|07:36 pm] |
And sometimes the inspiration comes from the fact you still remember what it was to surrender, and how you never can again..
"Shadows of the Heart"
Shadows of the heart
Scars that still remain
From a past you feel cursed
To forever remember
Yet can never really escape
Lessons not once asked for
Taught just the same
How trust can be the greatest
Of life's many treasures
Yet when mistreated
It is not easily regained
That the bonds of love
Of loyalty
And the vow of friendship
That it is not just a phrase
Words carefully carved into
The still beating heart
Of what once was
And can never again be
The true loss of a friendship
It still feels like dying
To this day
© Brian Milici
April 29, 2009
Feedback adored. Hope you all are well. :)
May you always find your smile. |
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| The Gaming Story (Video) |
[Apr. 24th, 2009|07:33 pm] |
Okay, so I decided to use my mp3 player's voice recorder feature to talk about the gaming story. Then I realized, hey, I have a webcam, why not just make a video blog, right? I can post it to youtube and it'll be even easier than posting an mp3 for everyone to listen to as youtube gives you the embedding code.
Well, it sounds simple enough, right?
It wasn't.
First, it took me four freaking attempts to finally complete the video. The first run got interrupted by the phone, and the webcam doesn't have a pause feature. So I started over.
Then my brother Thomas interrupted.
Again, I started over.
Then another phone call and my dogs stopped another attempt.
Then Thomas bugs me again. I totally got mad. heh.
So eventually this is what came out. It's not nearly as funny as it once was, because you can only tell the same story three or four times before it just gets to be repetitive and you just want it to be over with..
Then I upload it to youtube and await approval.
After about an hour, they deny it. Apparently you can only have videos of 10 minutes or less.
So I was just not going to post it, however, I was urged by a certain someone *cough*Randi*cough* to upload the video anyway and you guys can download it and watch it if you want. If not, that's cool. I don't blame you if you don't.
However, Rapidshare.com is totally legit. It's a clean site I use all the time for storing files. You need not worry about downloading any spyware on your computer from there. It's just a 14 minute video blog of me that you can play in Windows Media Player if you so choose. It's free to download, you just have to input the code they prompt you with and wait like 30 seconds or a minute. Rapidshare's pretty fast to download, so there you have it.
The gaming story video blog, that you have to work for to watch.
Cause that's how I roll.
By the way, I doubt even 5 people actually download this thing and watch it. Randi said at least she would though, and so ultimately she suckered me into it. So I have at worst one person willing to watch me stare blankly at my webcam and ramble incessantly about fantastical characters in a fictional world I play with friends in real life. Hah.
Try saying that three times fast.
*Download Video Here*
May you always find your smile. |
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